"Andy Lopez Died Because He Did Not Learn To Obey"

"Andy Lopez Died Because He Did Not Learn To Obey - This was my very first thought when I heard the news on Oct. 22 that a 13 year old boy had been shot and killed by police officers in Santa Rosa, CA. 

It reminded me of how adamant I was with my sons when they were little about obeying me.  I specifically remember saying, "when I say STOP, you need to stop...in fact, you need to stop dead in your tracks".  This, to me, was a matter of safety.  I remember explaining to them that if I said STOP it was because I saw something they didn't and there would be no time for them to get an explanation, they just needed to stop. 

An 18 year old son of one of the parents was in one of my classes when I was telling parents that one of their most important jobs was to teach their kids to obey - them and others.  He voiced his objection and said that it sounded like I was saying the parents were like kings and queens that needed "to be obeyed".  I told him I found it very interesting that he objected to the word "obey" so much, but that yes, that is a very important part of parenting.  Rules are everywhere and rules are necessary and it is our jobs to teach our kids to obey.  It can be a matter of life and death.  I have a friend whose dog died because he ate his bedding.  The dog never learned to obey; he used to eat everything.

The news said "they chirped their siren and demanded that he drop the gun".  Witnesses say the deputies twice, called for Andy to "drop the gun".  When police officers tell you to pull over, they make it very clear that you need to obey.  Andy didn't obey.  It's tragic and very sad.